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How to Charm Someone After Your First Date

Having an excellent first date is a wonderful thing, but it’s really only half the battle – you’re going to need to do a lot more than that if you hope to turn a successful date into a successful relationship. Thankfully, this isn’t anything like as difficult as you might have been led to believe; people talk a lot of nonsense and play a lot of games, and it really isn’t useful or necessary. In most cases, behaving like that will probably hurt your chances rather than improve them.

The best thing you can do, really, is be as natural and as honest as possible – but if you’d like a little more guidance than that, we’ve put together this quick and simple guide to understanding how to behave after a first date.

Immediately Following The Date

It’s a good idea to drop them a line an hour or two after you part – especially if you spent the night together. All you need to say is something like “Thank you again for last night/this evening; I had a wonderful time. See you soon!” – just something that lets them know you’re still pleased and excited about how things went, without putting any pressure on them or seeming clingy. There’s a lot of nonsense around about how you shouldn’t do this, but playing games doesn’t get you as far as you might think.

In The Next Couple Of Days

Vaguely keep in touch over the next few days. It’s probably best to quell any impulse to talk to them every second – a few texts or emails a day is plenty – but you definitely want them to get the impression that they’re interested and any advice to the contrary is probably damaging rubbish. It is a good idea to not make people feel crowded, but you should follow your instinct here – if they’re contacting you a great deal, that’s an indicator of how often they want to hear from you!

Organising A Second Date

After a few days have passed, ask them if they’d like to do something again the following week – but decide in advance where and what! “Can I see you again?” is not helpful; “Would you like to go to that other restaurant we talked about for dinner on Thursday night?” is. Specificity makes it much more likely that they’ll say yes (or, if they’re busy that day, that they’ll suggest another concrete day) and ultimately more likely that the two of you will actually see each other again.